The other day I got an email from a reader who’s going through her version of inner purgatory.
“How can one get through the day when everything feels so heavy and when months and months pass by and there is no relief in sight?” She asked. “How can one trust that a better life is out there, that a better version of me is getting ready to emerge?”
Sometimes the journey towards an inner breakthrough can seem so long and strenuous. You’ve worked on yourself. You’ve suffered so much. You’ve tried all the tricks. You’re probably the wisest person you know by now.
And yet, you are still not “there”.
Sometimes you may feel like you have made no progress at all despite everything you’ve been through. It’s absolutely maddening.
In those moments, instead of rushing to maximize the speed of your evolution…slow down.
Rather than secretly judging yourself as a spiritual retard who seems too slow to evolve…breathe.
“But I’ve been at this for so long!” You say. “I should have been a lot more advanced by now!”
You should? By whose standard?
Nobody is keeping scores. Except your ego. And rather than taking your feelings of hopelessness and impatience at face value, know that they are the signs of an agitated ego shouting “What about me?”
To that question the only perfect response is love.
Instead of trying to reason with your threatened ego, instead of trying to “look at the bright side” or distracting yourself from the frustration, give yourself more love, breathe, and slow down your pace of life some more.
Calmness is the antidote to agitation, as love is to fear. A huge part of learning to navigate your journey of transformation is learning to provide the former to yourself.
When you’re calm and loving to yourself, the question of “how much more time will it take for me to arrive?” won’t even come up.
(The real answer is…as long as it takes. Your higher self doesn’t have a problem with that, as it’s not held hostage by time. But it’s never something that pleases your ego.)
Every minute you spend trying to race past the pain and discomfort is a minute away from the inner marination that’s much needed to happen. What’s paradoxical is that when you give yourself the space to walk your path in your own sweet time, you, in fact, move faster.
it’s temping to assume that you go through the heaviness, pain, and emptiness for the purpose of getting to the promised land—the joy and bliss, the freedom and enlightenment. But in fact, the journey itself IS the purpose. You did not come to this world to achieve some enlightened state. You came here for the journey. Without the journey, there is no point.
Rather than hanging your life on positive beliefs and hopes for a better future, try to center yourself in the present, however uncomfortable it may feel.
The truth is you’ve arrived at the promised land already. Your only task is to realize that.
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